Get Up, Show Up, and Learn

I am praying God keeps us going and we neither one 'lose heart' as He reveals His will to us. I can see only now (in hindsight) how even in the divorce delays intended by my enemy to self-serve, God used it to our good in the supernatural...one example is the issue of visitation, only the long time allowed the therapist(s) to document both husband's personality disorder and daughter's feelings and experiences with her father. God worked those circumstances out so that she has the choice. And now there is this glimmer regarding the hope of debt-relief, that a year ago was not available to me but now because of time and trusting the attorney He provided, it seems this is working to our good as well. Over the last year and a half He has shown this in so many ways, that it has grown my Faith and Trust in Him. Having said that, know that with every leap of Faith and plateau of peace and grace there has almost always followed another fierce challenge from the enemy, trying that new faith and these battles can be brutal, but they always send me right back to my knees. And I always find Peace and comfort and Hope there. It feels as if the devil and Jesus are doing a battle for my spirit and the devil controls the stuff in the world and Jesus controls the unseen, and during the confrontations I get all jerked around and emotionally twisted up...and I even cry out and argue, "God why? I am not getting this; I am failing miserably...etc..." then after I am done venting, I humbly get my butt off the floor and look up and apologize for my ranting and He comforts me, almost like, "I know kid it's hard, but it is going to be okay and you must trust that I have your back and your front and your sides and just keep giving me your Faith, don't let go of My hand...I love you and I am bigger than any of this mess." I like what a dear friend said recently about life being a journey and that we never really arrive...Christians are headed for a heavenly destination, so long as we are walking through a fallen world we have not arrived, we just have to keep "getting up, showing up" and being the teachable children of God.